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Why does marriage grant forgiveness for all sins? The shiur develops a yesod that sin's core damage is self-centeredness, and marriage, conversion, and leadership create an opportunity to shift focus outward. However, the opportunity fails when outer-directedness becomes a license for rage rather than genuine adjustment to the other on their terms.
Rabbi Zweig explores the teaching in Masechta Makkos that three people have all their sins forgiven: a convert, one who assumes leadership, and one who marries (noseh isha). The source for this halacha (הלכה) is Parshas Vayishlach, where Esav marries Basmat, who is also called Machlat—a name associated with mechilah (forgiveness). The Rambam (רמב"ם) and Shulchan Aruch rule that both the chasan and kallah fast on their wedding day because it is like Yom Kippur for them. Several difficulties arise. First, this was Esav's third marriage—why didn't forgiveness come with the first? Second, the text calls the woman "Machlat," implying she grants forgiveness, yet God is the one who forgives. Third, how do we know the woman is also forgiven, since the language is "noseh isha" (the man who marries)? Fourth, what unifying thread connects conversion, leadership, and marriage that all three grant forgiveness?
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Vayishlach (Esav marries Basmat/Machlat)
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