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Why does the Torah (תורה) in Ki Savo seem to guarantee divorce? The pasuk describes a marriage that begins with the woman giving herself completely while the man has no obligations — essentially an abusive relationship. When one person gives everything and receives nothing, the giver loses self-respect and the taker inevitably loses respect for them.
This shiur analyzes the difficult pasuk in Ki Savo about divorce, exploring why the Torah (תורה) appears to predict marital failure with the phrase "v'hayah im lo simtzah chein b'einav" (and it will be that she will not find favor in his eyes). Rabbi Zweig explains that the key lies in understanding the sequence described: "ki yikach ish ishah u'va'alah" - when a man takes a wife and lives with her before nisuin (full marriage). The shiur distinguishes between erusin (betrothal) and nisuin (marriage) in Jewish law. During erusin, while the woman becomes an "eshes ish" (married woman) and is forbidden to others, the man has absolutely no obligations to her - no kesubah, no financial support, no responsibilities whatsoever. If they live together during this period, she gives herself completely while receiving nothing in return.
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Ki Savo 24:1
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