Measuring Myself by My Standards - Hillel's Teaching on Self-Worth

Full Summary

This shiur provides a deep analysis of Pirkei Avos (Mishnah (משנה) in Avos) where Hillel teaches three interconnected principles about self-evaluation and spiritual growth. Rabbi Zweig begins by examining a statement from Masechta Sotah about the end of modesty (anivus) after Rebbe Yehuda HaNasi's death, and how Rav Yosef's response reveals important truths about self-assessment. The main focus centers on understanding Hillel's teaching: "Im ein ani li, mi li? Ukshe'ani la'atzmi, ma ani? Ve'im lo achshav, ei matai?" (If I am not for myself, who will be? When I am for myself, what am I? If not now, when?). Rabbi Zweig explains that this isn't about selfishness, but about the fundamental principle that only our own efforts define us - no one else can perform mitzvos for us or live our spiritual lives for us. The shiur explores a fascinating Rambam (רמב"ם) in Hilchos Teshuvah about twenty-four things that impede repentance, particularly focusing on one who mocks mitzvos. The Rambam states that the real problem isn't the mockery itself, but that such a person "doesn't run after mitzvos" - suggesting that lack of enthusiasm for spiritual growth is worse than outright opposition. Through analysis of Mesilas Yesharim's discussion of zrizus (enthusiasm), Rabbi Zweig demonstrates that our true measure as human beings isn't our achievements, intelligence, or natural talents - all of which are Divine gifts - but rather the effort we invest. This principle explains why procrastination in areas of self-interest reveals our real priorities: if we truly valued personal growth through effort, we would approach tasks enthusiastically rather than reluctantly. The shiur connects this to a Midrash about King Solomon's teaching to learn from the ant, showing how the ant's refusal to take another ant's grain demonstrates the value of living from one's own effort rather than others' work. Rabbi Zweig explains that true modesty (anivus) comes from measuring ourselves against our own potential rather than comparing ourselves to others, which is why Moshe Rabbeinu could be supremely modest despite his extraordinary abilities and position. The practical applications extend to child-rearing, education, and personal development - emphasizing that we should measure ourselves and our children based on effort relative to ability rather than absolute achievement or comparison to others.