Understanding Divine Tolerance: Nosei Avon - Who Pardons Iniquity

Full Summary

This shiur examines the second of the thirteen divine attributes mentioned in the Torah (תורה): 'Nosei Avon' (Who Pardons Iniquity). Rabbi Zweig explains that when a person sins, they create a destructive angel that would naturally turn against its creator and destroy them. However, God demonstrates extraordinary tolerance by not only allowing the sin but actually sustaining this destructive force, preventing it from harming the sinner until one of three things occurs: the person repents, they suffer punishment in this world, or they face consequences in the world to come. The shiur distinguishes between two types of divine tolerance. The first attribute ('Mi Kel Kamocha') involves God allowing people to exercise free will and carry out their decisions, even sinful ones. The second attribute ('Nosei Avon') goes further - God actually supports and sustains the person even after they have sinned against Him. This is not merely allowing someone to be their own person, but actively providing for someone who has acted contrary to God's will. A crucial distinction is made regarding when such tolerance is appropriate in human relationships. An aggrieved party has the right to tolerate and even support someone who has wronged them personally. However, a third party has no right to allow one person to harm another. This principle has profound implications for parenting and relationships. When we are personally hurt by a child's or spouse's behavior, we should follow God's example of tolerance and support. But when someone's actions harm others or violate divine commandments, we have an obligation to intervene. The shiur connects this concept to Cain's response after killing Abel. When Cain said 'My sin is too great to bear' and was shown mercy, he proclaimed 'Mizmor Shir L'Yom HaShabbos' - a song for the Sabbath day. Cain realized that confession (vidui) automatically creates a new reason for thanking God, because the confessor recognizes that despite their sin, God continues to sustain them. This connects to the deeper meaning of Shabbos (שבת), where we exist not by virtue of our accomplishments but purely through God's support. On Shabbos, we don't need to justify our existence through work - we live entirely off God's grace. This is why there is no punishment in Gehennom on Shabbos, and why Shabbos represents one-sixtieth of the World to Come, where every Jew has a portion simply by virtue of their connection to the Divine. The shiur emphasizes that this tolerance requires wisdom in application. Parents must carefully examine their motivations when disciplining children - are they protecting God's honor and preventing harm to others, or merely protecting their own embarrassment and social standing? True tolerance, following God's example, means supporting someone who has wronged us personally while firmly preventing harm to others.