Expressing Appreciation: Obligation Despite Motive

This shiur examines a fundamental principle of Torah (תורה) ethics through the story of Og, who informed Avrohom about Lot's capture. Rashi (רש"י) explains that Og's motive was nefarious - he hoped Avrohom would die in battle so he could marry Sarah. Yet centuries later, Moshe Rabbeinu feared attacking Og because of the merit from this very act. This apparent contradiction leads to a crucial insight about human obligation and gratitude. Rabbi Zweig argues that the Torah operates on a principle most people psychologically resist: our obligation to others depends entirely on the benefit we received, not on the giver's motives. Using the paradigmatic example of honoring parents, he demonstrates that parents have children for fundamentally selfish reasons - continuity, the joy of giving, pride in their children's accomplishments, and even practical support in old age. Yet children remain fully obligated to honor their parents because they received genuine benefits: life, care, education, and emotional support.