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Why did Avrohom send Eliezer to Lavan's family—people guilty of jealousy, cruelty, greed, and even attempted murder—when he refused Canaanite wives for Yitzchok? The Ran distinguishes between innate character defects (kinah, sinah) that pass genetically to children, and terrible choices driven by self-deception—where people convince themselves their selfish acts serve higher purposes. Eliezer's test for Rivka evaluated not just her chesed (חסד), but whether her altruism was truly selfless—culminating in the ultimate tzimtzum modeled at the Akeidah.
Rabbi Zweig addresses a profound difficulty in understanding why Avrohom Avinu sent Eliezer to seek a wife for Yitzchok from Lavan's family, despite their glaring moral failings. The Ran raises the question regarding Yitzchok sending Yaakov to Lavan, explaining that certain character defects (kinah, sinah, achzarius, rechilus) are genetically transmitted to children, while others are not. The Canaanites possessed flaws that would be inherited, but Lavan's family did not—hence they were preferable marriage partners. However, this explanation seems utterly untenable when examining who Lavan and Besuel actually were. They attempted to murder Eliezer. Besuel was notorious for immoral conduct with brides (nisas kol kalah). Lavan was consumed with greed (chemdat hamamon), practiced deception, and later sought to kill Yaakov Avinu (Arami oved avi). How could the Ran possibly claim that kinah and sinah pass to children, but murder, theft, fraud, and immorality do not? For forty years, Rabbi Zweig explains, this Ran troubled him deeply.
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Chayei Sarah - Rivkah's Selection
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